this is an excerpt from a friends blog...with a few of my own additions..
Even though I've only been back a few short hours, I am finding it so diffucult. My heart is homesick for the place that I've called home the past couple weeks. Honestly, I feel more at home there than I do here right now. It's been hard living in two different worlds. I have my life in Milot, knowing that all the people I met and love are there....still loving...still working...still being, yet I am here. (don't worry...i still love and miss all of you here in the states!) The two worlds are so totally different...my heart is torn and I'm slowly struggling through it. I think it will take some time. I can feel my mind already forgetting what it is like living in Haiti...and I never want that to happen. Haiti was so good to me and so good for me.
as we were talking tonight she asked me how I was doing and as I struggled to answer, she said "tell me if this is what you feel like right now" and read that to me..
I miss Haiti. and I'm afraid to do life here cause I don't want to slip back into life here and forget where I was and what the Lord did...I can still feel the hugs of my kids and hear the sound of their giggles...I don't want to forget..
2 comments:
Dearest Amy,
As must as it sucks to struggle...never forget the tension that you feel, and to be honest you probably won't. You will always remember those faces, those hugs, the laughter. It's almost like mourning a loved one...it's like grief. One day at a time my friend, one day at a time. I admire your committment and your compassion.
Oh my goodness, that is exactly how i feel!I cannot think about anything else, which is really hard sinceI have a family! I feel so selfish in everything I own and I just long to hole and cuddle one of those precious children again. Is that so wrong? I am struggling to find my real purpose in this life and I cannot help feel that God is calling me to a higher purpose. I love you Amy and I so want to go back to Haiti!! You are a wonderful person!!
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